Doubting my doubts
I probably should’ve mentioned this on Saturday, but I wrote another post at Mormon Matters. This one was a chance for meta navel-gazing…one of my best pastimes. A look at that phrase, “Doubt your doubts,” with a twist.
I guess, over the past few days, weeks, years, or who knows of these forays into the internet, I have kept running against everything and everyone telling me I should stop. I should just stop trying to blog, stop trying to comment, stop trying to post, stay over on my own site, stay over in my own (disaffected) corner, stop trying to be a party pooper, stop trying to break up the band.
I confront the idea every day. These ideas are alluring and compelling. I’ve doubted whether I have anything to say here. I’ve doubted whether I’m doing anything other than making a fool of myself in places I’m not totally wanted in (if wanted at all.)
…but perhaps because I’m obnoxious like that, I’ve doubted those doubts. I’ve doubted people who say (and even the part of me that says…) that I have to renounce what I want to do just because I’m not well-received, or just because I disagree, or just because I don’t seem to fit in.